Tis so sweet

I’ve been struggling with something lately. A song, a hymn rather. Maybe you’ve heard of it, ‘Tis So Sweet to Trust in Jesus. It’s sweet and riddled with truth. I’ve always loved to sing this song, not for the words, but for the harmony. It has really pretty harmony. But two weeks ago, this song came on Pandora and I couldn’t sing it. I struggled. At that moment, a wonderful man with three small children was taking his final breaths. And a woman that had rescued, mentored and shaped someone very dear to me was beginning  a fight that will eventually usher her Home, as well. I don’t taste the sweetness here. In fact, I am frustrated and want my ‘whys’ answered. This is nothing but bitter.

I imagine singing this song when the sun is setting on a field of flowers, with mountains in the background. “Tis so sweet to trust in Jesus, just to take Him at His word. Just to rest upon His promise, Just to know, ‘Thus saith the Lord.’ Jesus, Jesus how I trust Him. How I’ve proved him o’er and o’er. Jesus, Jesus precious Jesus, oh for grace to trust Him more.” But in the darkness of despair and grief, I couldn’t sing. My heart hurt and the sweetness seemed distant. Sure, I “trust” that His ways are higher than my ways and that He understands more than I, but I’ve lost the sweetness.

A week later, the song came on again. This time hubby was with me. I expressed my human understanding and my inability to grasp the lyrics to this song. Life’s circumstances felt a lot more like swallowing those horse-pill kind of vitamins than it did sipping sweet, soothing honey. Anyone with me? I struggle when the storms come. I don’t understand God’s ways. Hubby spoke and with wisdom said, “The sweetness is knowing that at the end of it all, He is still there and offers something so much greater than what we are experiencing here. The sweetness is the HOPE we have. The ‘what’s to come’. “

This made sense to me. My eyes and heart seem to get stuck in the moment when they should be permanently fixed on eternity. When I choose to fix my eyes on my circumstances I am minimizing the very God that created the Heavens and the Earth. I am demeaning His ways. And I am shunning the grace He so willingly gave me.

He reminded me of this today :: Job 38 – 41. Read it. I mean it. It is a list of all the things God has done and is able to do. It reveals his power, his might and his bigness. I know, not a word, but that seems to fit right now. I feel like a child. A child that sits at the feet of something so much bigger, wiser, and stronger than anything I have ever encountered. I am afraid yet I have peace. I have hope because I’ve been given the chance to sit before Him. Jesus gave me that chance. Jesus. Jesus.

And I taste the sweetness of His name. I can say it in my despair, “Jesus.” I can say it in my weak parenting moments, “Jesus.” I can say it with a smile, “Jesus.” I can say it through my tears, both in sorrow and in joy, “Jesus.”

I won’t understand very much in this life. I will hurt. I will battle with being circumstantial. But I will remember the last line of the chorus …

“Precious Jesus, Savior, Friend;
And I know that Thou art with me,
Wilt be with me to the end.”

Oh for grace to trust Him more…

KC

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5 Responses to Tis so sweet

  1. kristenplamondon says:

    Yes, I so love these words! I struggle often with “Take my Life and Let it Be” and “I surrender all”. I’ve had glimpses of what it means to surrender all and it terrifies me to the core. But that hope…HIS hope it’s what keeps my arms open wide. And I love LOVE the passage from Job you referenced!

  2. Victoria says:

    Thank you dear KC for sharing God’s word.
    Perfect timing !

  3. Mary Jane burrell says:

    You have no idea how much this affected me today. My eyes filled with tears as your words touched the very spot in my heart that needed this very thing today! My middle son committed suicide 21 weeks ago and I have been trying to ignore it and deny it but I am struggling with the bitterness that comes with questioning the my Savior. I appreciate this post very much and I will print it out and read it again!

    • mrskcr says:

      Mary,
      Thank you for sharing your story with me. I am honored that God used me to encourage you today. May Jesus continue to draw you to Himself; that your love for Him and trust in Him will increase in spite of your circumstances.

      I will pray for grace as you trust Him more.

      Your sister in Christ,
      KC

  4. hannah says:

    kc. i could write many of the same words here. i love hymns, especially this one. often i end up singing the lyrics, through angry tears, just trying to believe them. god is so gentle and timely. he brings the warmth of this truth and melts my cold don’t-feel-like-tis-so-sweet heart.

    grateful to be reminded that we are not alone, be encouraged!
    also, i like you.

    (oh, and if you haven’t already, watch this through http://www.vimeo.com/71765067
    it’s a freedom song for me, so much rest!)

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