Parenting No-No

I have these kids.


Three of them, not the tall one. Oh how I love them and get frustrated by them. The children’s director spoke at church yesterday about time. How precious it is and how quickly it goes. “Invest, invest, invest.” And my heart’s cry is, “Yes, yes, yes.” But it is hard sometimes, isn’t it? These sweet little babes turn into tantrum two-year olds, whiney five-year olds, and sassy seven-year olds — I’m speaking hypothetically, sort of. And it is summer which translates to constantly together. Don’t get me wrong, I embrace summer. I long for it. Sometimes though, our days drag on. They aren’t always filled with flowers, sunshine and watermelon on a perfectly breezy day. No, there is screaming, arguing, and tears, lots of tears.

This morning I woke up early — something I haven’t done in a few weeks and I find that I’m paying the price. I need my quiet time. So here I am, currently reading Job and struck by this verse, “One should be kind to a fainting friend, but you have accused me without the slightest fear of God.” Job 6:14. Paraphrase, we shouldn’t assume things about our friends. In other words, don’t be a know it all as to what God is doing in the life of someone else. Sure, I get it. Or do I? This is probably the principle I apply least in parenting. I ALWAYS seem to know what my daughter or son was thinking. I am SURE they meant to. But did you catch the last part of this verse? …without the slightest fear of God. Uh-oh.  I am accusatory, parental, and quick to shell out discipline and while I claim God’s power, majesty and justice, my words/actions don’t always reflect it. I lack a fear of God. I forget that He could crush me like a grape in a split second {not that He would, but you get the idea}. These are His children, not mine. He loves them, has plans for them, and He invited me to be a part of His plans and purposes for them. How quickly I take Him out of the equation when tempers are flaring and it’s 5 o’clock and I don’t have dinner made or even planned, and the doorbell is ringing and I forgot to cancel our cable but their office isn’t open anymore and … and …

I am not kind to my fainting {translate :: hurting} child in a lot of moments and it simply boils down to the fact that I don’t believe God to be as great as I claim. For if I did, then my words and actions would reflect this more. How’s that for real? Pretty harsh, I know. Strangely, I’m not depressed. While sad that I caught a glimpse of my ugly humanity, I am encouraged, empowered and hopeful.

As I sit here in repentance His love washes over me and I find myself wanting nothing more than to know Him deeply. To understand Him more. To not only read His story, but also His promises; to digest them and live them out for my children, for my husband, for my friends, for me. That I might be the kind of mother that shows kindness to my hurting child. Kindness to my fainting friend. Kindness to a stranger.

Because I serve a great and powerful God.

No, my days will not all be easy, with rainbows. We will still have yelling matches and tears. But the more I invite Him into my day and my life, the more I will recognize His kindness and live it out. I will not be motivated by fear, but by His great love in that while I was a sinner, He sent his son to take my place. And I can walk in victory. Amen?!

Deuteronomy 7: 9 – I want you to know that the Eternal your God is the only true God. He’s the faithful God who keeps His covenants and shows loyal love for a thousand generations to those who in return love Him and keep His commands.

Happy Monday,


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5 Responses to Parenting No-No

  1. Andrew Pattison says:

    Great message. I don’t have kids, but applicable to me too. This was great for me to read this morning. Thank you for sharing your revelations. Love you! 🙂

  2. Kelly says:

    Wow, I so needed this today! Thanks K.C. for sharing!! So often i get frustrated or dish out a consequence thinking “What will ever get through to them?” Oh yeah, the amazing God that loves them more than I ever could, is working His plan in His timing… not mine!

    I love 2 Tim 2:24-26 as a reminder as a mom! I think I need to work on memorizing it!

  3. Melanie says:

    Just exactly what I’ve been needing to hear. I’ve had the Holy Spirit tugging at my heart, telling me to dive into His word. It breaks my heart when I just can’t keep my cool with my kids sometimes. I love what you said how you think you always know what your kids are thinking… Well I don’t. Thank you for being so real and raw. It’s encouraging to hear other Christians mothers speak from their hearts. Keep listening to the Holy Spirit and telling your story.

  4. Mom says:

    Revealing.convicting.insightful… God has your heart 🙂

  5. Charis says:

    Great word today. I need this reminder too.

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